Love

I have loved 2 girls in my life. The first I loved with my mind. It was a fanciful adoration, filled with all the quaint pleasantries of dreams and hopeful visions of the future. It was idealistic and governed by principle and thoughtfulness which led to passions rather than passions leading to principle and thoughtfulness. I prefer that sequence and it is familiar to me and my nature of operation, and expectation. It's like leaving the book of unionship completely open, and allowing the chapters to flourish unadulterated, without pretense. It was an idealistic love and relationship, but it had a foot in reality, for our actions were governed by the values we shared--equality, fairness, empathy, and kindness. Yet, the emotions were easily organized and reasoned with, changed and reorganized as suited to pleasure. The flexibility and agreeableness was comfortable and secure. This was compelling and reminescent of the kind of sanctity found only in the home; an easy correlation because I live and take residence in the mind. It felt so good to be home. I loved her, and ultimately I played the fool tho, but the love did expire after time.

The second I loved with my heart, presenting a strange, new kaleidoscope with which to view and experience the world from. In this forum I followed the dictates of my heart, leaning towards and learning more about compassion and care fer making each other's heart warm, than I had previously given consideration to. I cared less about what others thought, or what was proper and fitting, as I had always given myself over to analyzing our behavior in the past, to assure all proper requisites were met. Now I just acted on the whims of my heart and accepted things more as they were. It was easier fer me to be content with less, but it was still scary. My first bouts of jealousy followed, and doubt, fear, and even anger all made appearances. At times it was a rollercoaster, that finally did end, but the love has endured despite it all, and continues to surpise me with its continued existence. I have always been surprised by the strength of emotions involved, and what my heart has told me along the way.